I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He better not be in your backpack
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
