found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize
