have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
i think i just lost a toe
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
