We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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