That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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