i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Randomize
