My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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