oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
