You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Thank you for not boning my boss.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
