I think im going to throw up on grandma
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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