Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
