then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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