Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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