First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
