so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
