i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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