I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
