I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
