Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
