I wannas sexs uuuuu
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
