I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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