I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
