He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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