i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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