chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize