it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
