He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Randomize
