He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
