Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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