i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
high people should be assigned attendants
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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