Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
