I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
