Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
