Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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