i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Everything about him screamed your future.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
