so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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