A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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