How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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