I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
