I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
