yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
