i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
