is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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