Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Watching her eat just hurts me
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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