i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
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