What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Text me some of your sweat
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
