I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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