I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize