The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
