his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
